Archive 1

Psychic

The International Association of Athletics Federations is proposing the introduction of psychic testing for all athletes following increasing instances of the use of psi powers in major sporting competitions. Many competitors are now turning to telekinesis, astral projection and similar disciplines in order to gain an advantage over their fellow sportsmen and women, and the feeling is that this is not consistent with the spirit of fair competition. Readers will no doubt be familiar with the controversy surrounding the Brazilian Carlos Mendez who employed levitation to gain a gold medal in the 400 metres hurdles at the last Olympics. More recently, several competitors have been accused of using their auras to influence the flight of javelins, but such allegations are difficult to prove. Rather more obvious was the blatant use of bi-location by the Australian athlete Mary Clarkenwell, who was able to compete simultaneously in three different events at a recent tournament in South Africa. Her trainer quite rightly pointed out that her remarkable supernatural talent merely helped her to overcome certain logistical problems, and gave her no particular advantage in the individual events. However, when she passed the baton to herself in the 4x400 metres relay it caused much consternation amongst the spectators, a great deal of confusion amongst the judges, and ultimately prompted the powers-that-be to undertake a serious review of the rules.