Professor Ricky Stratocaster presents
Nuns don't grow on trees
Project Pogo
"Semi-automatic pastry..."
A review
Across the Atlantic by land
Rise of the machines
"I've lived all my life up a mountain..."
"When Zeppelin built the first motorbike..."
"A Huge pie hanging in space..."
"...not stopped bouncing since 1972..."
Get this content for your website.
Click here.
Scandal has hit the tiny village of Chelford in Cheshire after a local woman, Mrs. Edna Slut, claimed that she was being bugged by MI5.
"I know for a fact that there are listening devices in my home," Mrs. Slut told us. "I don't know exactly where they are, but I have noticed that the cat's been walking funny for the last few days."
Mrs. Slut is a well known and highly influential figure in the area. By day she electrocutes cattle at the local abattoir, by night she socialises at the bingo hall. But why is she so certain that someone is bugging her?
"They're trying to topple me from my position of power as President of the Chelford Pottery and Needlecraft society," she says. "Either that, or they're after my recipe for Dundee cake."
The truth of this matter may actually be far stranger. An anonymous caller has, on several occasions, contacted a local newspaper in nearby Macclesfield and claimed that he has proof that Mrs. Slut is not being bugged by MI5 at all, but by MFI, the nation-wide chain of furniture stores.
"One of the most controversial musicians of recent years..."
"Quality Donkeys for Hire or Purchase..."
"The caverns were closed to the public for their annual hosing down..."
"Welcome to today's edition of Diagnosis..."
more...
All material Copyright © Paul Farnsworth 2000-2013, and may not be reproduced, without the express
permission of the author, in any medium including but not limited to personal blogs, messageboards and other internet forums. This
restriction also applies to the hotlinking of images. Permission can be requested at bleeding-obvious@hotmail.com.
All characters, companies and organisations are fictitious, and any similarity
to persons living or dead is entirely coincidental.