Visit the historic Rumpleford Abbey, learn something of its glorious past and admire its stunning architecture. And for those of you who don't appreciate history, there's bumper cars and naked darts.
Watch the nuns as they gambol and canter in a specially created paddock that simulates their natural habitat. WARNING: Do not feed.
Uncovered by palaeontologists in 1988, these are the actual fossilised eggs of giant monks who stalked the Earth over 65 million years ago.
Offering a panoramic view of the entire park.
All the fun of the big top! See Brother Gabriel walk the high wire. Gasp in amazement as Brother Hacket puts his head in the Satanist's mouth. Wet yourself laughing as the Abbot himself gets fired from the big cannon.
Quite simply the biggest, scariest religious-themed rollercoaster in Europe.
It's a great life, just messing about on the water! And if you're lucky you may catch a glimpse of the majestic shoals of marine friars that have made their home in the lake.
Authentically simulating life in the middle ages, our highly acclaimed medieval village is a favourite with kids and grown-ups alike. See the quaint old cottages, visit the Colosseum and the Pyramids and learn what life was really like before the invention of the wheel. With complimentary potatoes.
With the very latest in communications and presentation facilities, our conference centre is the ideal choice for your company's annual general meeting. Our friendly and helpful staff of executive monks are permanently on hand to provide refreshment, offer assistance and pray for the continued success of your company on the stock exchange. Chocolate digestives are extra.
Wild monks still roam this area of natural woodland. Our guide will show you where they nest, where they feed and where they play. The reserve has also recently become home to a pack of bishops, and if you visit during the summer months there is a good chance you will be able to watch them swinging from the trees.
Whether you're Mr Percy Pious, the most religious man on the planet, or just some kind of hippie Satanist pagan weirdo, you're sure to find something to amuse you here at Monkworld...
So, whatever denomination you are, why not drop in and see us here at Monkworld On second thoughts, no Scientologists - we can't be doing with all that weird shit.
Major General Barmy-Phipps Discusses Operation Growbag
How to look hip and cool and trendy and windswept
Guy Parker takes you for a ride
As of February 2012 The University of the Bleeding Obvious comprised over 300 pages. We realise this might make the site a little difficult to navigate, so here's some suggestions to help you get around.
Mouse over the graphic to select a section index, or use the drop down box.
05 December 2013: Dusting Behind the Large Hadron Collider
04 December 2013: Disposable Sausages
03 December 2013: Maxilingual for Motorists
Go to the blog