*@%£!

What is the difference between man and machine? What separates human intelligence from the mechanical logic of the computerised mind? What, if anything, makes human consciousness unique within the infinite universe? Is it the ability to think intuitively, to make random and apparently irrational decisions? Is it the imagination that allows us to bridge the gap between the commonplace and the possible? Is it the ability to love, to feel compassion, or any of that Star Trek stuff? Well, according to Professor Brinkley Tramlines, the difference between man and mechanism can be defined very easily - it's the ability to swear.

"Too fucking right," says Professor Tramlines. "These bastard computers don't know crap about the real world. They're all locked up safely in twatting laboratories, working out frigging chess problems. Arseholes! They haven't got a sodding clue about the kind of shit that real people have put up with. And they say that one day computers will run the world - Ha! Bollocks to that. You try looking up 'twatty flaps' in your spellchecker and see what you get. Trust me, we won't succeed at producing real machine intelligence until we finally come up with a toaster that can tell you to piss off."

 

computer

 

 

Return to Archive 3

The Annual 2017

FREE Download

Or read it online here.

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2015 The UBO Annual 2016 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Oompah

Traditional Oompah music under threat.

Promo Image

Sofas are from Mars...

...dressing tables are from Venus.

Promo Image

Come to MonkWorld!

See the monks in their natural habitat

Promo Image

Promo Image

Roman Hole

Archaeologists disoover historic hole.

Promo Image

Night of the Womble

Lost Womble book to be published.

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...

04 September 2017: Fraudulent Bananas

02 September 2017: Orchestra Exchange

01 September 2017: Mr Forage and His Newts

www.bleeding-obvious.co.uk