Tuesdays

Mrs Alice Sideways' Campaign for the Abolition of Tuesdays is gathering pace, especially now that her pressure group has gained the support of backbench Labour MP, the Right Honourable Kenneth Trolley.

Trimming the day down

"I've never been particularly fond of Tuesdays, and I don't think I've ever made a secret of that," said Mr Trolley at a recent press conference. "In fact, back in 1984 I was part of a commission set up to look into the possibility of trimming the day down to a more manageable nineteen and a half hours.

"I was particularly keen to lose a couple of hours in the late afternoon, and public reaction at the time indicated that we could also have cut the period between 7.30 and 8 o'clock in the evening without meeting too much opposition. In the event, the proposal came to nothing as it was deemed that the whole thing would be too expensive."

Streamlining the week

Nevertheless, the project has never really gone away, and has its supporters in all levels of government. It's generally agreed that the removal of Tuesday would go a long way towards streamlining the whole week, and there are even a few members of the current cabinet who are in favour of tearing a chunk out of Wednesday as well.

The only obstacle has been the cost, but help may be just across the Channel. There is hope that an Anglo-French attempt at shortening the week would spread the cost and thus make the whole thing more feasible.

"Let's hope it's a success, and the sooner the better!" says Mr Trolley. "Personally, I find stupid bloody Tuesdays dull, objectionable and smelly, and I for one can't wait until it's had its day."

 

calendar

Return to Archive 2

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2018 The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

InstagramFacebookTwitter
Promo Image

Comfy Dinners

The only meal you can sleep in

Promo Image

A Boost for Industry

Airfix wins major defence contract.

Promo Image

The Battersea Wigs Home

That's no life for a healthy young wig.

Promo Image

Electrosausages

Replacing your wiring with sausages.

Promo Image

Centuri Space Supplies

Secondhand space travel

Promo Image

Teleportation Breakthrough

Experiments have limited success.

 

Teaching Carrots to FlyTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

The Bleeding Obvious Prime Time Gameshow Generator

Latest blog entries...

20 February 2020: How Long is a Piece of String?

18 February 2020: The Beaufort Scale

17 December 2019: We're Recruiting...