Crime Waves

A report commissioned by the Home Office has revealed that for the year 2015/2016 the crime rate in the North Sea was practically zero.

At depths of around 95 metres, instances of housebreaking were significantly lower than the national average, and car theft was practically unheard of. In deeper regions the statistics were even more striking.

Researchers are currently looking into the reason for these impressive figures. No conclusions have yet been reached, but many police forces around the country are already experimenting with planting seaweed in troubled night-spots in order to stem the outbreak of violent crime.

crime waves

 

Return to Archive 2

The University of the Bleeding Obvious's Private Bits

Private Bits

72 pages of previously unseen material including Formula 1 Shopping Trolley Racing, Knee Operations for Fruit Flies, Quantum Farming, a visit to The Book Crevice, Gary the Builder, and The Affair of the Flat Vicar, a brand new adventure for the eminent Belgian dick, Anton La Cranque.

All this and more will only be available in this volume as a PDF and is yours for a measly £1 - yes £1 (or whatever the equivalent is in your fancy foreign money). To download it now, click here.

Click here to close this box

The UBO Annual 2020

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2020

Order via Amazon UK

Order via Amazon US

The UBO Annual 2018

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Order via Amazon UK

Order via Amazon US

The UBO Annual 2017

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2017

Order via Amazon UK

Order via Amazon US

UBO Vol 1

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Vol 1

Order via Amazon UK

Order via Amazon US

UBO Vol 2

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Vol 2

Order via Amazon UK

Order via Amazon US

UBO Vol 3

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Vol 3

Order via Amazon UK

Order via Amazon US

 

InstagramFacebookTwitter
Promo Image

Maisy Donnington's Cheese Etiquette Page

Maisy Donnington is your guide to the wonderful world of cheese

Promo Image

Hoofer

Dancer mown dow by chorus line.

Promo Image

Bongo's Books

Selections from Dr Bongo's dazzling literary career

Promo Image

Squeak Off

At last a cure for squeaky shoes

Promo Image

Selling Crap for Fun and Profit

We have the pens for you

Promo Image

Ken's News and Fags

The last remaining independently-owned high street business in the UK.

 

Teaching Carrots to FlyTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

The Bleeding Obvious Prime Time Gameshow Generator

Latest blog entries...

24 August 2020: The Wilderness: A Survivor's Guide

10 August 2020: The Language of Dance

06 July 2020: Introducing the Spellchecker Pen