Reinforced Lettuce

 

Biochemists have developed a new titanium-reinforced lettuce, which is over fifty times stronger than regular varieties.

Thin veins of metal are interlaced with the leaves to provide high-tensile strength without compromising the plant's natural flexibility.

lettuce

 

This will make for hardier salads and can be used in the packed lunches of people with dangerous and high risk jobs, such as racing car drivers or stuntmen. It will also protect the crop from pests such as slugs and snails, as the reinforced leaves will wear the little bastards' teeth down.

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Fergus Pong invites us to his rural information hub.
We open your jars for you!
The latest celebrity craze.
The contempt it deserves
Cathedral root system causes concern
Buy it now
Attacks by monsters on the increase.
Final proof of the existence of cheese

 

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