If you can read this, then you probably think you don't need glasses.

The Problem:

As we get older, some of us find that our eyesight changes. Small print becomes difficult to read and it gets harder to focus on distant objects. Opticians recommend that you get your eyes tested at least every six months, so that they can supply you with optical solutions to meet your exact needs.

Unfortunately there are some customers whose prescription remains stable and do not need to update their glasses so frequently. These people provide a serious challenge for the ophthalmic profession, and prevent us from tapping into a potentially lucrative revenue stream.

The solution:

Now at last a remarkable new innovation in ocular technology has provided the answer to obdurate customers - disposable glasses. These lightweight and stylish new spectacles come in a range of exciting new fashionable styles.

And the really good news! Well, the patent light-refracting biodegradable plastics used in the lenses are not only environmentally friendly, but are also designed to dissolve after 300 hours of use. That means you'll never be without a fresh pair of glasses, and we'll never be short of repeat business.

The science:

Illustration of visirays entering the headspace via eye podules.

You've probably guessed that it's all based on the polarization of visirays. As we all learnt at school, we are able to see because our eyes shoot out special waves, visirays, which interfere with the objects we are looking at then return to our eyes and are translated into images.

These visirays pass harmlessly through regular lenses, but our new disposable glasses use a filter to slow down their transit. (The slight time lag to your vision is something that you will hardly notice.) This process generates heat, which gradually causes the lens to deteriorate - the more you look, the faster they dissolve.

So don't waste time struggling with your current perfectly adequate pair of glasses. We need your money right now.