Sir Ronnie Balls'
Dirty Book Club

"'Ere - I know wot discerning gents like yerselves want: hot literature, know wot I mean?  Oh yes. That's why we here at the dirty book club have got hold of some of the classics of English fiction and sort of... well... spiced 'em up a bit.  Nice!    Each one of our 'special editions' has been rewritten by a carefully selected team of perverts and deviants to include maximum levels of smut and innuendo.  Tasty!   'Ere, take a little look at this lot..."

One Flew Over the Knocking Shop Ken Kesey	War and Tits Leo Tolstoy	A Midsummer Night's Gangbang William Shakespeare
The French Lieutenant's Bottom John Fowles	The Old Man & The Slapper Ernest Hemingway	Three Men in a Goat Jerome K Jerome

Smashing!   Each of our dirty books will be discretely packaged in a plain wrapper and either delivered directly to your door, or surreptitiously slipped into your pocket by a man called Gary in the gents' toilets at King's Cross Station.  And, as an added bonus, if you subscribe today you will receive, absolutely FREE, a specially cleaned-up version of Lady Chatterley's Shopping - in which Lady Chatterley decides to leave Mellors at home, and goes out to buy some new shoes.