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The
Merton-Cockerill Pumpcopter
In 1972, an unemployed sheep botherer called Gary H
Merton had a dream. He believed that one day it would be possible for pumpkins to
fly. Oh, it was a wild, crazy, mad, mad fantasy, and all his friends told him he was
wrong in the head. But Merton was adamant! He was determined! And,
what's more, he was as mad as a fish full of Alka-Seltzer. However, it wasn't until
he met the wealthy industrialist Carl Cockerill that his idea was to take off.
Cockerill liked Merton. He liked his enthusiasm. He liked his
dedication. More importantly, he liked his carefully worked out blueprints, so he
stole the idea, made himself a small fortune and left Merton destitute and suicidal in a
trailer park in New Mexico. To date, the company has sold somewhere in the region of
four thousand Pumpcopters. They are used mostly in north western Canada, where that
sort of thing is considered acceptable.
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