The Johannesburg Hair Bank

Baldness is a worry for many men once they reach a certain age, triggering a desperate compulsion to try and preserve what little hair remains by whatever means necessary. And it's understandable. Baldness can make many men feel self-conscious and embarrassed. It can also make their heads more susceptible to water damage during heavy rain, and they are unable to wear hats because they slip off. And, of course, it doesn't help when random strangers in the street point and shout things like 'Baldy Baldy Slaphead' before running away. On reflection, perhaps I should stop doing that.

So baldness is a problem. If only there was some way to save up all the hair that grows so copiously in your youth, and use it again in your later years. Well now a company in South Africa enables you to do just that. The Johannesburg Hair Bank allows you to open an account when you're young, energetic and hirsute, from which you can make withdrawals when you're old, knackered and bald. The more you save, the longer your hair will be. Not only that, but your hair will also earn interest, tax-free.

At present the bank is not accepting new customers, but that is set to change soon and interested parties will be able to open an account with just a few clippings. For more information, write to:

The Johannesburg Hair Bank
Next to the Toenail Depository
Near the State Dandruff Library
Just Behind the Snot Emporium
Johannesburg
South Africa

The Annual 2018

COMING SOON: The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Supermarket Kerfuffle

Misaligned caster causes pile up.

Promo Image

Drive-By Wallpapering

The dark side of interior decorating

Promo Image

Crime Waves

North Sea crime figures fall

Promo Image

Twenty-First Century Scouting

Sir Edmund Woggle is Scouting for Boys.

Promo Image

Knitting in Colour

Introduction of the first colour knitting patterns.

Promo Image

Scientists predict the world will run out of apostrophes.

And we're running short of hyphens as well.

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...