Copper Sulphate

The future of children's chemistry sets may be in doubt following news that there is a world shortage of copper sulphate. The compound, which has absolutely no conceivable useful properties, occurs naturally in only two places in the world - a remote river valley in southern Honduras and on a small patch of waste ground behind the post office in Harrogate. The first of these is all but mined out and the second is a protected UNESCO World Heritage site, so unless new sources can be found experts predict that supplies will run out completely by the end of 2016.

So far efforts to create copper sulphate in the laboratory have been unsuccessful, although a team in Holland have high hopes for a technique that involves firing high velocity M&Ms into a slab of granite. In the meantime, manufacturers of chemistry sets are replacing copper sulphate with other substances such as margarine, carpet fluff and earwax.

"In most cases, customers won't notice any difference," said a spokesthing. "These compounds are just as reactive as copper sulphate, with the added advantage that in at least two cases you can spread it on your toast. We don't think people will notice. After all, nobody said a word in 2007 when we substituted sprinkles for iron filings."

The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Monsters

Attacks by monsters on the increase.

Promo Image

Gentlemen's Etiquette

For men of character

Promo Image

Crime Waves

North Sea crime figures fall

Promo Image

Donald Fact's Fact Spanner

No. 128: Chinese Shelves.

Promo Image

Announcing the iSpong

At last, a revolution in automated sponging.

Promo Image

Salisbury Cathedral

Cathedral root system causes concern

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...