Emergency Merger

Plans to merge emergency services in the UK have been branded 'mental' by opposition groups, who claim that the decision would be a recipe for disaster. Proposals have been advanced that will see Fire, Police and Ambulance departments merge into a single unified service in a move designed to increase efficiency and response times.

Several pilot schemes have already ended in disaster with ambulance crews called out to attend domestic disturbances equipped only with fire axes, firefighters carrying out emergency CPR with truncheons and policeman setting fire to cats stuck up trees. Nevertheless, the government is keen to press ahead with the scheme despite what it calls 'a few isolated setbacks'.

Meanwhile, motoring organisation the AA, which brands itself 'Britain's fourth emergency service', has enjoyed rather more success after merging with Relate, and now offers roadside assistance for relationship breakdowns. I thank you.

The Annual 2017

FREE Download

Or read it online here.

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2015 The UBO Annual 2016 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

World of the Wacky

With Mr Ooluv

Promo Image

Cut Price Chips

You like chips. You like lots of chips.

Promo Image

Ice Lolly Skating

All-weather skating.

Promo Image

Thinking of Buying an Octopus?

What you need to know

Promo Image

Sounds of Nature

Relax with Chickens

Promo Image

Subterranean Elephants

Underground pachyderms

 

Teaching Carrots to FlyTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...