Competition Humming

The Fourth International Humming Championship takes place in a field just outside Wigan this weekend and is open to anybody who has a favourite song but doesn't know the words. Two thousand entrants took part in last year's event, simultaneously humming over two thousand different tunes. There were reliable reports that the din could be heard more than thirty miles away.

Organisers are hoping for a better turnout this year. Despite there being no shortage of competitors, there were only twenty spectators last time and many of these were noticeably intimidated at being outnumbered a hundred to one. Additionally, last year's event was augmented by several craft stalls, a raffle and a brass band, and it is believed that these may have been responsible for driving many people away.

Still, the reigning champion, Ian 'Tone Deaf' Crompton, has been very active in encouraging people to come along. "It's a marvellous event," he lies, fondly recalling how he previously romped to victory with his ear-shatteringly hideous rendition of 'Eton Rifles' by The Jam. "I know some people can find humming quite irritating and that the prospect of suffering a couple of thousand folks doing it in unison is only slightly more tolerable than repeatedly slamming you own head in a door, but it's by supporting events such as this that we keep our communities alive. And, on the plus side, the whole thing only last about four and a half minutes, which is barely long enough to ruin your afternoon, let alone scar you for life."

The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

What is Soil Made Of?

If mountains are made of rocks and oceans are made of rain, what is soil made of?

Promo Image

North Yorkshire's Got Talented Traffic Wardens

Following the recent Bake Off contest to find a dinner lady

Promo Image

Bad Grammar

Our members find that they are pillowried on message boreds and internet flora because of mispelings, the inappropriate erection of words, or bad grandma.

Promo Image

Death by Pastry

Earth will be nothing more than a huge pie hanging in space.

Promo Image

Cornwall on Loan to USA

Picturesque county goes on tour.

Promo Image

Bing Crosby Boxing

Punching singers in the mouth

 

Extreme DinosaursTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...