RAF Discontinues Use of Sticky Tape

 

Sticky Tape

 

The RAF have recently stopped using sticky tape to stop pilots falling out of their planes, ending a tradition that stretches back more than fifty years. Prior to 1962 the Royal Air Force found that it was mysteriously losing many of its aircrews. Planes would return to their airfields completely empty, and military boffins were simply unable to account for the disappearances.

After lengthy investigation it was discovered that pilots and navigators were simply falling out of their cockpits as they performed complex loop-the-loop manoeuvres, and so it was decided to stick them to their seats using adhesive tape such as Scotch Tape and military grade Sellotape. However, the Ministry of Defence has recently decided that it must abandon such archaic technology if it wants to maintain a credible military strike force. In the future air chiefs plan to use Blu-tack instead.

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