Liposuction

"There are basically two schools of thought when it comes to the removal of excess fat," says Dr Hilliary Biscuit of the South East Yorkshire Clinic for the Cripplingly Obese. "There's sucking and there's blowing. Well, liposuction has been around for a while now, and it's had its chance. It's time for a new approach."

The new approach that Doctor Biscuit has in mind is to throw the whole procedure into reverse. Literally. He inserts a tube down the patient's throat, connects it to a powerful, industrial strength compressor and switches on - blasting that unwanted flab straight out of the patient's rear end.

"I won't deny that it comes as a bit of a shock to most people," Doctor Biscuit admits. "But at least it's quick. And anyway, as far as the patient is concerned it's a relatively simple procedure. It's the guy who has to stand at the other end with a bucket that I feel sorry for."

liposuction

 

Return to Archive 2

The Annual 2017

FREE Download

Or read it online here.

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2015 The UBO Annual 2016 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Cornwall on Loan to USA

Picturesque county goes on tour.

Promo Image

Support a Helpless Pirate

Could you spare just three doubloons a day?

Promo Image

An Appeal on Behalf of Mountain Rescue

Please give all you can to help mountains in need.

Promo Image

Nasal Hair Loss

Eradicate the shame of thinning nose hair

Promo Image

RAF Sticky Tape

RAF discontinues use of sticky tape for pilots.

Promo Image

Squeak Off

At last a cure for squeaky shoes

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...

15 October 2017: Rinse Easy

04 September 2017: Fraudulent Bananas

02 September 2017: Orchestra Exchange

www.bleeding-obvious.co.uk