A Brief Word About Swiss Army Cheese

An army marches on its stomach, Napoleon Boneparte once said, although he said it in French. The Swiss have taken this sentiment very much to heart, to such an extent that every member of the Swiss army is provided with a wedge of cheese as part of their basic kit.   It is their responsibility to keep their cheese clean and properly maintained at all times, and woe betide any soldier who allows their cheese to become scuffed or sweaty.

Originally Gruyere was the Swiss army's cheese of choice, chosen for its high calcium and vitamin content, as well as its ability to withstand extremes of temperature.  However, Gruyere has always been prone to explode at high altitude, and the unacceptable numbers of troops returning from Alpine training missions with cheese wounds prompted the Swiss military to seek an alternative.

And so, in 1921, Swiss dairy technicians set about creating the ultimate combat cheese.  What they ultimately came up with was Appenzeller - a more stable, high tensile cheese which had the added advantage that it could be sharpened to a point and used with deadly effect in hand-to-hand skirmishes.  It quickly became a favourite with Swiss infantrymen, who found that they were able to hollow out compartments in the cheese in order to conceal useful tools such as knives, scissors, files, corkscrews, screwdrivers, nail clippers, magnifying glasses, compasses and things for getting stones out of horses' hooves...

Return to 'Cheese Etiquette'

 

Return to Archive 1

 

The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

An Interesting Article About Shark Fishing

Twenty thousand sharks a week pass over Mr Pong's farm

Promo Image

What is Soil Made Of?

If mountains are made of rocks and oceans are made of rain, what is soil made of?

Promo Image

Jars-4-u

We open your jars for you!

Promo Image

Alps

Mountain range requires repointing.

Promo Image

Anti-Assertiveness Classes

Tone it down a bit.

Promo Image

Nasal Hair Loss

Eradicate the shame of thinning nose hair

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...

22 December 2017: How to Look After Your Cement Mixer

21 December 2017: Evening Classes at The University of the Bleeding Obvious

20 December 2017: A Ding-Dong over Duvets